We eat out at least once a day, sometimes twice and at other times we do the trifecta, so these are the 25 Things that Annoy Me about Cafes, Restaurants, and Bars. I know, I know, we are terrible but we live in a great area where we can, and we do. I feel experienced enough to know that there must be some restaurant etiquette from BOTH customers and wait staff, or waiters and waitresses, not to mention the owners and managers.
Updated October, 2018
Annoying Things that Wait Staff or Servers do at cafes, restaurants, and bars
Contents
- 1 Annoying Things that Wait Staff or Servers do at cafes, restaurants, and bars
- 2 Packing up the Restaurant …
- 3 Asking me how my meal is …
- 4 Clearing Dishes …
- 5 Dirty Cleaning Cloths…
- 6 Lines on wine glasses …
- 7 I would rather be somewhere else staff …
- 8 Cafes and Restaurants that lie …
- 9 Wait staff you are not Hester Blumenthal…
- 10 Big Mistake …
- 11 Timing ….
- 12 Kitchen and Wait staff need to coordinate …
- 13 Wobbly Tables …
- 14 Sexist Billing …
- 15 Annoying Things CUSTOMERS do at cafes, restaurants, and bars
- 16 Your children …
- 17 Your dogs …
- 18 Feet on Seats …
- 19 Bag Seats …
- 20 Know it all Customers …
- 21 Tipping Sucks …
- 22 Extortionist Customers …
- 23 Fussy Customers and Customers with Genuine Needs …
- 24 Know your Order …
- 25 Split Bills …
- 26 Tight Arses …
- 27 Social Media Wankers …
- 28 Are they are any other things that annoy you at restaurants, cafes and bars?
Packing up the Restaurant …
Do not start packing up the restaurant while I am still eating. That is such bad form and makes me feel unwelcome. Yes, I know you want to get the hell out of there, but if you have specific times you say that you close, well pack up after that. Not while I am on my starter.
Asking me how my meal is …
Do not ask me how my meal is when I have just taken the first mouthful. It is like those escape to the country shows when they walk the people in the front door and ask do they love it and do they want to buy it. They need to look around, and I need to eat my meal before I give you my verdict. If I hate it, there will be food on my plate when you remove the dishes AFTER I have finished eating.
Clearing Dishes …
And this leads straight on to clearing of dishes. Do not start clearing the plates until we have ALL finished eating. If you are clearing them as each person finishes, the slower eater feels shamed and just gives up to get rid of their meal.
Dirty Cleaning Cloths…
To staff at cafes, restaurants, and bars ..PLEASE use a clean rag to wipe down tables. This is one of the most annoying things servers do. Don’t use those dirty, grimy rags that you do everything with. Yes, the tables will dry off their own accord but couldn’t you dry them off, so we don’t all have to watch the moisture dissipate as we keep our elbows, etc. off the table.
Lines on wine glasses …
Another thing that annoys the hell out of me are the lines on wine glasses. We know you have a huge markup on wines, so don’t stiff me by only pouring to the line. Fill it up.
I would rather be somewhere else staff …
On the other hand, staff who ignore customers while they are chatting on their phones, playing Pokemon or chatting up someone are annoying. Do NOT forget you are at work, and your job is in the SERVICE industry. I will back you, but you need to be a professional first and foremost.
Cafes and Restaurants that lie …
Cafes and restaurants should not say it is gluten free when it is not. I mention this because it regularly happens to our friend, who KNOWS the difference. This is culpable behavior.
Wait staff you are not Hester Blumenthal…
Don’t be a wanker describing the dish. You are a waiter or waitress, and not Hester Blumenthal. However, many wait staff can make excellent recommendations. On the other hand, all wait staff should be able to pronounce the dish and know what is in it.
Big Mistake …
Also, do not look someone up and down and decide whether they are a good fit as a customer for your establishment. Remember Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, when she went into the Rodeo Drive boutique, and they wouldn’t serve her? “Big mistake,” so do not be so arrogant and think that you can judge a person based on their appearance.
Timing ….
Waiting an unreasonable amount of time for your order to be taken, and/or being fed so quickly that there is no time to sit and chat. We know that you just want us out of there.
Kitchen and Wait staff need to coordinate …
Not sending all of the meals out at once, is a pain in the neck. For some reason, my niece never gets her meal at the same time as the rest of our family. This has become a running family joke now, but it does suck.
Wobbly Tables …
It’s just common sense, fix a wobbly table before customers sit down. I am the master of fixing tables with sugar sachets, or anything else I can find. I shouldn’t have to do this, particularly when I look gorgeous.
Sexist Billing …
Don’t give the bill to Gordon because he is the man. Ok, give it to Gordon but it is a sexist practice and one that can be difficult if you are at a business meeting. If I am running a business meeting with men – and I do – and I fully intend to pay – and I do – then if you give it to one of my male clients, that embarrasses me…and them when they have to give it back to me.
Annoying Things CUSTOMERS do at cafes, restaurants, and bars
Your children …
While you love your children, I don’t necessarily. It is excellent that you bring your kids to restaurants and cafes, as I did. Children should go with their parents. But …I do not want your kid running amok, while you sip on that Margherita and ignore your kid. Take them to restaurants and cafes, and help them learn appropriate behavior. These places are not child minding services. I always feel for the wait staff trying to bring hot coffee out, and some kids is running around. Mum’s and Dad’s etc. would go nuts if their kid were scalded or burnt.
Your dogs …
Like your kids, dogs should go to restaurants and cafes if this is allowed by the managers. Yes, your dogs will get their bowls of water before I get my water and that is ok. Most dogs are excellent and just lie around, but those of you who let your dog sit up on your lap and eat from your plate, well ..it’s not necessarily what everyone wants to watch. Those of you who do not control your dogs when they go troppo as a bird flies by, need to control your dogs for the benefit of all of the customers. There is NO such thing as a bad dog, just a bad owner…same for children. The dog and kid owner patrons can sometimes be the double whammy for other patrons.
Feet on Seats …
For those of you who put your feet up on a seat ….one word …DON’T. Such bad manners, and I do not want to sit on your dirty foot or shoe marks. How would you feel if you got dog poop on your clothes? Don’t even put your feet up at a beach side cafe, relaxed and chilled out as you might feel.
Bag Seats …
In Paris, you will see the women claim seats for their bags, and these are known as ..bag seats ..though I am not sure what the French term is. Ask a Parisian lady to move her bag so that you can sit, at your peril.
Know it all Customers …
Customers who are rude to wait staff tick me off. Do NOT snap your fingers or be a condescending dick. Yes, you may watch Master Chef but come on, you are not better than anyone. You might think that you are a wine and food connoisseur but not everyone in the restaurant, cafe or bar will appreciate your grandiose knowledge.
Tipping Sucks …
Tipping. Like OMG. I have an entire article on Tipping Around the World, so rather than get into it here, have a read of it. However, I will have one shot right here. America – pay your staff a decent wage. No one wants to have a lovely meal and then have to play mathematical puzzles at the end to work out what should be paid as a tip.
Extortionist Customers …
Customers – just because many people do use TripAdvisor and Yelp, do not threaten cafe, restaurant and bar workers with a bad review. If you have had a seriously awful meal, by all means, write a review, but I have heard people tell wait staff at the start of the meal, that if it isn’t good enough, they will write a bad review.
Fussy Customers and Customers with Genuine Needs …
Customers who totally rewrite menus. You go out to eat because you want a professional to feed you. They have devised a menu that reflects their passions and skills. While there are times when people need some variation due to allergies, auto-immune conditions, etc., etc., most other people should not entirely rewrite the menu.
We were out at a very nice Thai restaurant and the lady next to us, ordered a Thai Laksa – without the lemongrass, without the ginger, without the prawns, without the galangal, without the coriander, etc., etc. I think she ended up with rice stick noodles on their own. Why go there in the first place, and why order something with so many disagreeable ingredients?
Know your Order …
This is the fault of both the customers and the wait staff. When you are out with a large group of people, remember which dish you ordered. Ok, the waitstaff should have a system going for who ordered which meal, but when you forget what you ordered, the wait staff are standing there feeling like idiots.
Split Bills …
If you are going to split a bill, have the courtesy to inform the wait staff beforehand that this will happen.
Tight Arses …
Do not be one of ‘those’ people who say, “but I didn’t have bread, and therefore my portion of the bill is less than yours”. Just divvy the damn bill up amongst how many of you there are, regardless of what you do or don’t eat. You are dining together for a purpose – enjoyment or business. Have a read of this if you want me to prove my point, Traveling with Other People – the Dont’s and the Dont’s
Do NOT be the person you goes to the toilet when it is your turn to buy drinks. We have a friend who does this all of the time. We have a name for him, and it isn’t nice.
Social Media Wankers …
This is aimed directly at me. Making everyone at your table wait while you get the best Instagram and Facebook shot of everyone’s meals. I have included the links to our sites so you can see what a social media wanker I can be.
Are they are any other things that annoy you at restaurants, cafes and bars?
The whole handing the bill to the guy things drives me nuts! My ex knew nothing about food so we had a deal that if I pay for the meal then I get to pick the restaurant. So pretty much every time it was me paying. And probably about 95% of the time the wait staff would automatically hand the bill to my ex. And a lot of the time when I gave them my card to put in the card reader, they would give it to him to enter the pin. Like they couldn’t believe a woman could be buying a man a meal. Wouldn’t mind it happening on the odd occasionally but it was always happening
Very very annoying
I do agree that serving staff should be paid a decent wage. But, I prefer to leave a tip- or not- to reward the staff for the care and attention they provide. And, I resent an automatic charge- like just was provided my SMALL party at a restaurant. Because unless you are SERVING my wine (and not bringing me a bottle that is 3 to 4 times the cost), servers do not deserve a 15, 18 or 20% tip for carrying the bottle once. If anything, that would only apply to the very first glass. The rest of the time, I should be tipped, since I am serving the wine.
Good points Roy
THIS! And here’s what I can add to this list, aimed specifically at Australian restaurants: Do not use tables that have the size of a postal stamp, and do not squeeze customers into every little bit of available space. I hated how waiters and customers would constantly bump into my chair while I was eating. This is not relaxing, nor enjoyable. Restaurants are so much more than the food that they serve. It’s the experience. Sadly, more often than not I felt as if was just being fed so that I can make room for the next customer.
yes very valid points particularly the postal stamp sized tables.
What annoys me the most is that too many bars, restaurants serve disposables. Disposable cups for water, disposable small cups for dressings, plastic straws, etc… It is not an easy task to get through all that if you live a single use plastic free life and always need to ask: how do you serve your food/drinks. Thats why I always carry some of my reusable with me, even while traveling, just in case…
I hope that will change in the near future:)
Jule
I hate that too. It is lazy and irresponsible.
‘Such a funny post Paula!
I agree with not clearing the dishes while someone is still eating, or worse, taking the dish or glass away! I’m a slow eater so I always feel under pressure to hurry up when I’m with a group as the plates have been taken. Oh, and I’ve also asked for my glass back ‘cos I hadn’t finished lol!
So now me. I’m extremely guilty of not letting my friends /family eat before I’ve take a photo. And not just any photo mind you, but a good one! I’m also guilty of asking for things without this or that ‘cos I have a nut allergy. All nuts, and I’m also picky not liking chocolate, bananas, or coffee. I know! I’m that person!
I would still love to have dinner with you, and I will have your coffee, chocolates and bananas for you Victoria.
Great points, enjoyed this post. The biggest one as far as being a customer is the first – I’m a paying customer, let me enjoy my meal without putting chairs on the table and starting to mop. Clearing dishes is the same thing.
The one shocker you gave me was about the pre-advice on a review. Really? People do that? That’s really low class.
Frank (bbqboy)
I agree Frank, it is slack to clean up while we are eating, but people threatening a bad review is disgusting on every level.
Paula, Yes, you and I can go out to dinner together. I agree with you on every.single.point! I do think that the Europeans are better at this than Americans. They let you eat, talk, sip, sit, and relax. Americans want you done and out. It annoys me to no end! Cheers!
Come to Australia. We sit for hours ..but they do a lot of the thing I complained about, both customers and waitstaff.
I knew as soon as I read the title that this would be a great post and imbued with your wit. We were at a very nice seafood restaurant where you would expect superb service, and the waiter whisked my appetizer plate away WITH FOOD STILL ON IT without asking simply because my entree had arrived. Considering how much I had paid for that crab cake, I had intended to eat the entire thing. Teaching all the complicated American tipping rules to my teen has been difficult. Table service vs counter service vs grab-and-go all have different rules.
That is bad on every level taking your plate with food on it. Ditto when you still have wine in your glass. american tipping plays with my head.
Haha – at first I thought gee you have certainly never worked as a waitress (I did and frankly I was the world’s worst waitress but at least it gives me some empathy with today’s serving classes) then I read on and realised you don’t seem to have much good to say about customers either. I know you have been a customer because I have had lunch with you – I do remember you and almost everyone else photographing their food – I think there is an etiquette exception here for bloggers. I also remember you had perfectly good manners and treated the wait staff with respect – so now I think you are just stretching the truth a bit to get a laugh. Am I right?
Funny Lyn, I waitressed throughout my university days, working at quite lovely restaurants in Sydney. I loved it and was good at it too. I always take the piss when I write, but I also am on point at all times too I think. Looking fwd to our next lunch together too.
Paula, I have laughed like you have no idea. There are so many things in here that ring a bell. Yesterday, I was asked how my meal was when I didn’t even have time to take a first bite. Plus, clearing the plates one by one (not at the same time) is a theme in here. The worst is when they take the plate and do not even ask if you have finished. The other thing that puts me on a bad mood is when you have to wait to be seated when the restaurant is not even half full. And, lets not talk about servers who fight and yell at each other in front of customers.
Love it Ruth, and yes taking the plates before everyone is finished is annoying, as well as waiting to be seated while they are not at all busy.
What a great list! My pet hate are rude customers that click their fingers for the waiter’s attention or have the waiters running circles around them to try and please the fussy customer. We heard a rude American at the breakfast buffet on one of our cruises who spoke to the waiters like they were dirt under his feet. We gave him such dirty looks and very loudly said he was disgusting. I hope he heard us!
I saw this in Ubud, Bali when a group of Chinese women walked in and were clicking there fingers. I was so cross that I gave them the evil eye …to no avail. The lovely ladies in the warung just accepted it.
I love this! I can relate to a lot on both sides. On the customer side, I am guilty of putting my feet up on a chair at a beach café. I will definitely be more conscious of that now 😉 Being an American, I agree on paying waitstaff a decent living!! Thanks for the morning smile!
Thanks Becki for keeping your feet off the chairs now (smiley face). And yes the US should pay their waitstaff properly.
Paula, I love that you call it as you see it. I find all the same things annoying and am also guilty of being that person that has to take the perfect shot of their dinner before they can tuck in.
Aren’t we total pains. I am always saying, wait I need to get a photo. Then I don’t always use them.
Interesting timing. At dinner tonight I had ordered finger food. I had my last bite in my hand when the server took my plate. I also had to laugh that you included yourself, but I think wanker is a bit strong. 🙂
OMG, taking your plate on your last bit is wrong on every level. You are nice that you don’t think I am wanker.
You hit the nail right on the head, Paula. Almost every point you mentioned happens more often than not,d even in ‘good’ restaurants and cafés. I particularly hate when I’m being asked how my food is while I’m still chewing on my first bite. I have to swallow my food in a hurry to reply to the supposedly ‘courteous’ question. Good post!
I hate it when that happens. And putting the chairs up in the restaurant when we are still eating, really bugs me.