“Don’t get into cars with strangers.” We all grew up hearing this sage advice from our parents, and then we repeated this to our children and on and on these pearls of wisdom go.
So why do we get into cars with strangers when we travel, without a backward glance, except maybe once or twice, at what we had learned, and known as considered advice to protect us from stranger-danger and the like.
One of our scenarios
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We met a man in Strasbourg, France. He was actually the owner of our amazing surrealistic art gallery that we stayed in. We met him and talked in broken English for a grand total of maybe 30 minutes on the day we arrived. You know the routine, here is the toilet, it is a little finicky, so you need to flush it delicately. Here is the meter box, because the power is a little temperamental. We didn’t get into personalities or into deep and meaningfuls.
On our 4th day, he re-appeared to see how we were going, and we got to talk to him about the gallery and what type of exhibitions he had on, and how we had fixed the dripping tap for him. Again we didn’t get to know too much about him but he seemed nice enough – one might say an eccentric type, but that works for us.
As he was leaving he asked would we like him to take us for a drive the next day along the Alsace Wine Trail. Of course, we jumped at it. Local. Knows this area. Knows the customs and traditions. That is what we do and what we like.
Exploring the Alscace Wine Region with a stranger
So we did. We drove to the stunning town of Obernai, and there we had a delicious lunch together. Then we started to talk with him. He was very interesting and told us lots about different things about the people and the towns. He was also quite odd, in that hard to explain way.
He then asked if we would like to go mushroom picking in the forests. We jumped at the opportunity because we like experiences. Just because I had a dress and boots, and the full on French makeup, the just in case Parisian look, was not a bother. Walk into a forest, grab some mushrooms and we had an experience happening.
Hansel and Gretel and a witch
We drove and drove, stopping at times to see stunning villages. Then we drove for a very long time in complete silence. That is when I started remembering – Don’t get into cars with strangers. We didn’t know this man. He wasn’t talking, and I was starting to freak. I kept thinking of different people who had disappeared without a trace. That is what I do. I am overly dramatic. I said one word in this silent car, to Gordon, who was in the front seat. “Ivan”.
I hate to be horrible to our Strasbourg man, but Ivan Milat was a horrid mass murdered in Australia. He lured people to their gruesome deaths by taking them into the forests, or in Australia’s case, into the rainforests.
We got there at about 4.30pm. We got out to look for our mushrooms. I did what any modern woman would do, and I quickly posted on Instagram, so that people might know my whereabouts, should anything untoward happen.
We walked, and we walked, and trust me I kept him in front of me at all times. My boots were not the most forest friendly outfit, but at least I would look good when they discovered my body.
Don’t get into cars with strangers
After about 2 hours, I kid you not; I had had enough. I said something along the lines of “where are the ……mushrooms, merci”. And I got in return, “just a little further”. It was like Hansel and Gretel being led to the that old witches house. An interminable time later I just stopped and said NO. He kept saying, just a little further, only about another hour. Say what! I turned, dramatically, to start the long ascent down, and Gordon came next to me, to tell me to stop freaking out. I said to him again, “Ivan”. He knew what I meant.
Next thing our friend, yelled loudly, I kid you not, ‘TURN AROUND’. We did, me expecting to be blown into the after life. He did shoot us. With his camera.
We all then trundled back down the mountain. One of us a neurotic mess. None of us with any mushrooms.
Getting into cars with strangers when you travel
And it got me thinking about what had been drilled into me as a kid. Don’t get into cars with strangers. Why do we disregard all of this when we travel. All I can figure out is that we do tend to throw caution to the wind and trust everybody and everything. We feel invincible and believe that everyone is just an ambassador extraordinaire when we travel.
So we started the long drive home. He received a number of disturbing calls. Our French is crap so we couldn’t figure out the conversation, but it was heated. Was it because he didn’t deliver the goods, us, to the witch? Don’t know. Was it an experience that we can put as a highly interesting one? Yes, most definitely, if it only proves that I have at times, an overactive imagination.
Look, he was strange. The situation was strange. The whole walking through the Vosges Forest in my “I look chic enough to be in Paris” attire, was funny. Check out my Instagram because I know someone would have seen it and been able to find my body. Did Gordon think I over-reacted? Hell yeh. But did he feel the situation was quite bizarre, yes he did actually.
There are other ways to travel around Strasbourg and this delightful region.
Would we get into a car with strangers again after this? Well yes, we would and we have. I don’t know; that damn travel bug just liberates you from ordinary commonsense, but not always from an overactive imagination.
Do you get into cars with strangers when you travel?
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This had me on the edge of my seat, Paula. Honestly. I would’ve gone about it just like you did – jumped at the chance of spending time with a local and try such a cool experience. But you never know! I’ve let my guard down in the past with couchsurfing experiences and nothing happened… you’re right, you need to trust your gut. In any case, awesome dinnertime story!
Thanks Margherita, it is a great story but funnily enough, it still makes me a little uneasy.
Oh gosh, you can see how gap year students get into trouble can’t you! We take for granted when we visit somewhere in the middle of nowhere how helpful the owners always are… Something always to keep in mind – the handy instragram posting is a clever tip!
Anna, I wanted everyone to know my geographical location ..the middle of the Vosges forest..somewhere.. near a witches house 🙂
Hi Paula,
Wow, that was quite an experience. I could feel your trepidation. I think you did the right thing by turning around. I would have done the same thing. If you’re normally a trusting person but you feel something amiss, that’s your instinct warning you. As travelers, we need to rely a lot on our instincts. Thanks for sharing your story.
So true, I think that and still do, that something was not quite right.
While I knew you were still alive (how else could you have written this post) you did have me going there!
Would I get in a car with a stranger? I’m sure there are circumstances when I wood and in fact I have. Probably not the. Eat idea but sometimes the temptation is just too great!
We still do it, but that one accession did have me a little concerned.
I generally don’t get into cars with strangers. In fact, I can only really think of one time when I did. I was a solo traveller and teenager in Norway at the time, trying to get to a youth hostel before it closed. Darkness was falling and I still had a few miles to go, with pack, etc. A car pulled up and the man (who could clearly see where I was heading – the road led to not much else) offered to give me a lift, which I accepted. It meant I got to the youth hostel in time for a much-needed meal. I generally wouldn’t do it, but sometimes common sense prevails and the situation seemed perfectly safe to me. You never can tell, of course, and I would certainly advise my own children not to get in cars with strangers.
I think the likes of AirBNB and other similar situations are different. It’s pre-arranged rather than an on-the-spot incident. In fact, with many of those kinds of sites, you can even read reviews of the hosts in advance. If we completedly wrapped ourselves in cotton wool, we would never meet anyone! 🙂
Agreed Paul, a life half lived is a life lived in fear; though I was a little fearful on this occasion.
Wonderful, thought-provoking post Paula. Yes I have done it, and actually I’ve had both good and scary experiences. What a great story though, and certainly not speaking enough of the lingo is far from ideal under those type of circumstances.
I think it must have seemed petulant when I just point blank said, ‘enough’. The entire experience didn’t sit well. Maybe it was me but I generally have a pretty good feel for these things.
The hospitality of strangers is one of the best things I take away from travel – The world is not such a bad place after all you know 😉
Most of the time it works out brilliantly and is enriching to our travels. This time … nah.
that sound freaky! I would have been freaking out as well. I mean, sure there are a lot of good people out there,but we do have to be cautious. I haven’t experience riding in the car with stranger and freaking out but I did experienced freaking out when my travel buddy and I had to arrive a stranger’s home late at night. We got along fine but it got freaky….because he was odd too, even asking me about where exactly I live as he got the Google maps ready.
We are all very trusting people and that is both good and not so good. I am not advocating making people do a security check, but this post was put up to make people think a little. Thanks Stacey for your great comment.:)
I know what you mean about trusting strangers. With the likes of AirBnB and Uber, I started to feel safe and that the world is an open place but sometimes maybe parents were right in telling us the old wise saying! Interesting story and will keep that in mind next time I take a ride from a stranger abroad 🙂
I think that you need to keep this in mind, yet in saying that some of our best experiences have been with randoms.
It seems we’re all pretty alike in this respect- I’m another one who’d jump at the chance to go with a local somewhere unusual for that “authentic experience” and then freak out with visions of axe murderers! Breaking the rules and going against common sense kind of goes with travel. I cringe when I think back on some of the things I’ve done, because I was in another country….riding motorbikes without a helmet, never wearing a seatbelt, smoking all sorts of weird things etc…
Phoebe, ditto. If my life played before me eyes I could at least say with all honesty it was never boring. 🙂
Not cars perhaps; but we followed a stranger into his castle once. As we followed him up the circular turret stairs I imagined all sorts of horrible outcomes – and no-one would ever know what happened to us. Luckily he turned out to be a perfectly nice person who just wanted to show us his amazing home.
That is great and what we would also do. This was just one situation, and there have been a couple of others, where it just didn’t sit right with me.
Paula, I have to admit, I always will jump at the chance to go with locals. However, I have had a few times I worked myself into a tither as well. Doesn’t stop me. Love, love, loved this post!!!
Thanks Corinne, we are so similar that it is spooky 🙂
I would have freaked out in the forest too. What an incredible tale. It reminded me of the day we followed a stranger through an unknown town in eastern Turkey. http://www.budgettraveltalk.com/2013/12/19/introduction-kars/
I love the support I am getting. I wonder if it is the same stranger we also followed in Turkey? 🙂
omg when I’m travelling i do this a lot, reluctantly, but sometimes you have to take the help. Im always very careful though and keep my phone to hand!
I hated it when I lost coverage; then I really felt vulnerable. But, I/we still do it. Serendipity?
I’m in for mingling with locals and coming along with them, but indeed, with your situation, it felt a bit fishy and freaky! I’m glad nothing happened to you guys!
Me too 🙂 I still maintain it was an odd situation but in the end, a good story 🙂
I love this story. We do the same thing! Only well into the drive with strangers do we think “should we be doing this”. That said, we wouldn’t even think to do it in our home country, USA. Weird.
It is weird isn;t it. Maybe our trust factor is so high when we travel.
Glad it turned out well. I think when you travel you need one person who will jump in the car and another to say, wait he could be an ax murderer. You balance each other.
LOL. I tend to figure these things out ‘after’ i have jumped in the car.
Paula, thanks for sharing your experience. I agree that I have also gone in cars with strangers when I travel and also had a healthy apprehension about my safely, which is offset by my desire for a local to show me around.
On one of my early trips I was travelling solo in New Zealand and on my first evening in Christchurch I went to see a winter street parade. I ended up having a chat with a family beside me and had a lovely time. They asked what I was planning to do and I advised that I planned to walk around the centre of Christchurch and then depart. they offered to take me on a drive around the hills around Christchurch. I agreed, they picked my up from my hostel the next day and we had a great outing to an area I did not even realise existed. It was a great outing, but i always had that concern int he back of my mind as well.
I agree Anne, a local tour wins hands down over a potential axe murderer.
I have had two incredibly bad experiences getting into cars with strangers while traveling, yet we still do it. Or worse, we invite strangers into our car at times. I think we trust our instincts. Your story was really scary. I would have bailed out after about 10 minutes. You are much braver than me. Do you think there were mushrooms? (BTW – before posting this comment, I lowered my number of minutes . . twice).
Thanks Rhonda, I think I was brave and stupid. I donut think there were any mushrooms. I am normally pretty brave but my instincts kept saying something was not right. Yet, we have done it again and again.